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Daily Archives: February 20, 2012

11 Top Ways to Keep Things Heated up in a Long Distance Relationship

When you’re in a long distance relationship, there are many things that can be done in order to heat the relationship up a bit. Without these secret, seductive tips, you might find that holding a long distance relationship can be tough. Even if you’re both not always away from each other, but there are those business trips and getaways that might seem like forever. There are, however many different things that can be done to spice things up and make things not so hard to bear while you’re away from each other. They are pretty good for bonding too. Psychotherapist Tina Tessina PhD. Says that “some separation can be good for the relationship because you get the chance to miss each other, but, no matter how much you’re in love, it’s important to do some creative stuff to stay connected.”

1. Create a radio station on Pandora just for him. Place some favorite songs of yours, his, and both of yours on it. Add those songs that make you think of him while he is away. Email him the link so he can listen to it while away.

2. If you’re going out with some of the girls for the night, use Gmail’s Mail Goggles before heading out. This makes you do a math test before sending out an email later on. This way your man is not going to wake up to an awkward, misspelled email in the morning.

3. Send him a postcard from your local mailbox or other fun destination with a short, sweet, simple message like, “Wish you were here…” or “Thinking of you…”

4. Wrap up the Kama Sutra or other provocative book and mail it to him. Mark all of the pages that have positions in it that you want to try!

5. When you know he is out to dinner with some co-workers or friends, call the place they are dining at and order a round of drinks for all of them on you.

6. Make one sexy calendar out of your sexiest photos using an online software or service, and then mail it to him as a little everyday surprise.

7. Next time you get on Skype to do the deed, or just talk, make it a romantic moment by turning the lights on low and lighting some candles around you. It definitely sets the vibe.

8. Send him a sweet, yet super funny ecard to give him a laugh, but let him know that you’re thinking about him at the same time.

9. Want to know his opinion on some dresses at the mall that you can’t decide on. Snap some photos of you in them while in the dressing room. Have him choose his favorite, and model it for him next time you’re together again.

10. Start a Google+ account for the both of you so you can share notes of love, pictures, videos, and daily updates of each other. This is creative, but fun.

11. Make a date night on Skype, and challenge him to a strip poker tournament.

Online Dating Tips: Build a Better Online Profile

Ever wonder why some people get dozens of responses to their online dating profiles while others have an inbox that gathers dust? It’s all about presentation. There’s a method to the online dating madness. If you’re just starting out in the online dating world, or if you want to revamp your strategy, you need to focus on the basics. The quality of your profile description, photo and introductory emails will ultimately decide whether you end up dating several fantastic singles or receive one generic email from someone who’s totally inappropriate for you.


The Profile: Keeping It Real

Take time to really think about your profile before you post it.  Choose a clever username that reveals your personality and interests. Avoid anything too cheesy or generic, like Loverboy95.  Keep your bio short and to the point. Erin J. Shea of Oprah.com suggests daters include three separate paragraphs. Mention your likes, dislikes and a bit about your past and present history. Close with an update about book you’ve read or movies you’ve seen recently.  Your status may succinctly state what you’re looking for – “a fun-loving guy who hikes and skis” or mention what you’d like to do on the weekend “Looking for a date to take to the music festival downtown.” Be open and playful. Don’t be too demanding and picky and spend time mentioning what you don’t want. I’ve seen this on profiles, and it’s a real turn-off. Update often – don’t post your profile and let it languish for months or years without adding new details about your life or replacing the profile photo occasionally.


For Photos: Women: Flirt! Men: Try Strong and Silent

According to the Huffington Post, women will get more responses by smiling and making eye contact in their pics. For men, it’s the opposite. Avoid eye contact. Women savor a man with a bit of mystery in a Showing a little cleavage doesn’t hurt, either.  The L.A. Times article, Online dating secrets, as revealed by math majors, notes that 32 year old women with plunging necklines get 79% more responses than more modestly dressed women.  Of course, the number and the quality of the responses may be two different things. Young guys with great bodies get more responses from females when they go shirtless. As far as pics go, if you got it, flaunt it. And remember the webcam and cellphone pics that were all the rage on MySpace? They are an effective pose for both men and women. That’s probably because they show the person’s true looks-there’s no retouching or glamor shots. It shows the person in their natural habitat.


Stay platonic and literate in your first response 

 Resist the urge to comment on any body parts, no matter how attractive. Remember, the person you’re contacting doesn’t know anything about you other than what’s on your profile. Thus, first impressions are very important.  If you’re a girl, making frisky comments too soon may cause a potential suitor to take you less seriously as a steady girlfriend. If you’re a guy, dwelling on a woman’s décolletage or other body parts makes you seem creepy. A woman you’ve never met can construe even a generic “you’re pretty” message as a pick-up line. Talk about interests, hobbies, and other things mentioned in the the profile. Save the physical compliments and sexy talk for later, after you know each other better.

Take the time to craft a well-written and grammatically correct email. Don’t write a novel or consult your thesaurus, either. Use natural, everyday language  and avoid truncated texting words like “Luv” and “u” instead of “you.”  LOL and ha ha are okay, but other types of netspeak are turn-offs in an introductory email. Refrain from bragging about your accomplishments or mentioning inflammatory subjects like religion or politics.  Instead, bring up specific interests you have in common or cities where you’ve both lived. Find a common thread and start a discussion.

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How to Maintain a Long-Distance Relationship

More people are maintaining long distance relationships than ever before, thanks to online dating, texting, cell phone pics and videos and other high-tech ways to keep in touch. But there isn’t any substitute for in-person, in the flesh interaction. A long distance relationship can turn stale after awhile without a good plan of action.  Here are some tips for making the most of a long distance love affair.

Talk honestly about your feelings and goals; be willing to compromise.

 What do you expect from each other? You need to be honest and confront major issues like monogamy and the possibility of one partner moving to the other person’s  city. Some situations, like a summer internship, are short-term, and won’t require a lot of patience to endure. If one person has a great job in San Francisco and the other has a great job in Seattle, eventually one or both partners will have to make a compromise.  Changing jobs or work hours to visit the other more often is a must in many cases. Long-distance relationships can easily last months or even a few years, but only unique and determined individuals can make it work longer than that

Call or Email Daily.

 Send an email, text message or other note every day without fail.  Some days you’ll have the time and desire to make a two-hour long phone call or video Skype for awhile; other days you may be busy at work and only have the time for a quick text message or Facebook post. Regardless, steady contact is necessary in a long distance relationship.  It’s hard to gauge how someone feels, or even if they’re thinking of you at all, when they can’t see you in person, in the flesh. Steady contact via   technology can pick up some of the slack.  If it’s the end of the day and you haven’t heard from your love or vice versa, that’s a danger signal. If you truly love and respect your partner, your theme should be “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”, not “Out of sight, out of mind.”

Hop on a plane regularly.

 Visit each other often. Of course, economics, work schedules and  the distance between you may dictate how often this can actually happen. If you’re in Chicago and your partner is in Milwaukee, a trip every weekend is do-able. If  you’re in Prague and she’s in New York,  you’ll have to intersperse in-person trips with extra video Skype sessions.

Be an individual.

Don’t overcompensate for the fact that you don’t live in the same city as your partner. In other words, don’t send too many texts or call too much. Live your own life and develop new interests so you’ll have plenty to talk about when you Skype.

Take Advantage of Technology

Play new virtual online video games with your sweetheart to recreate an actual date with Avatar.  Instead of merely talking on Skype, give each other tours of your surroundings or watch a favorite TV show together. Use Smart Phone apps that feature messaging and photo sharing just for couples. Tweet each other a lot and sneak in a Facebook chat  to discuss the latest news stories.

Plan for the future.

Long-distance relationships will stand the test of time if we know our partner is thinking of the future.  Discuss vacations, moving in together, marriage, having kids, or whatever you both desire for the future. Having something you both can plan and look forward to will strengthen your relationship.

Surprise your partner.

 Send an unexpected gift, singing telegram or handwritten love letter. Your partner will also appreciate a sexy photo or video at the end of a long day. (Just make sure it isn’t intercepted by a third party!)

 Consider the Positive Aspects of a Long Distance Relationship

And look at the bright side of a long distance affair. You won’t have to argue with your Significant Other about misplaced toothbrushes or dirty laundry piled up on the sofa! You’ll avoid the little things that drive most couples crazy – that is, until you move in together!